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In two unrelated conversations this week, regret came up and it got me thinking….thinking about my life, decisions I’ve made, and how those decisions have affected my path.
I’ve made a lot of great decisions in my life so far…
1. Marrying Neal!
2. Becoming Theodore’s mommy
3. Getting my Master’s from Kansas State
4. Running the Country Music Half Marathon with Team in Training
5. Moving to Vermont to work at Dartmouth College
6. Transferring to George Mason University after my sophomore year of college
But there is one decision that I still regret…
1. I regret not attending the University of Nebraska for my undergraduate degree.
Growing up, my dream was to be a meteorologist. I kid you not, I wanted to be a hurricane specialist and was OBSESSED with the weather.
As I searched for colleges, Nebraska quickly rose to the top of the list and when I got in, I was beyond excited. Over the next few months I listened to a lot of people’s opinions about whether or not I should go. I listened to my parent’s advice about money. I listened to the advice of the church I was attending about my spiritual health if I moved. I listened to my friends who were staying in Texas for school. And in the end… I didn’t go… and I still regret it.
Now the truth is, all of my best decisions came after that moment and I’m pretty sure my life wouldn’t have turned out the same way if I had gone to Nebraska.
It’s a weird mix of emotions when you regret something so much and yet you know in your head that in the end it was meant to be!
Although it has been 11 years, it’s still something I think about, but I’m grateful for how my life has turned out. As I move forward I want to strive to not to regret the decisions I make, and if I do regret them, I hope to trust that it’s what was meant to be.
Do you have any regrets?
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Tagged with: Regrets
Filed under: Deep Thoughts • Personal
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I don’t have a ton of regrets as I think the things I did do and those that I did not do have led me to where I am today and I am pretty happy with myself and where I am today. However, I do regret not finishing my Bachelor’s degree. It would have been easier to have done it when I was younger but that doesn’t mean I still can’t do it! Great post btw!
Betsy recently posted..Back Together
I have made a lot of good decisions but also have a lot of regrets – I have one similar to yours though. My first year of college I went to Miami University of Ohio. I wanted to go there my entire life and was so pumped when I got in. I liked it there but had a lot of other things going on and was too young/dumb to realize how good I had it, so I only stayed for one year and then moved home. I finished my degree at a local school. I often wonder how differently life would have turned out and where I would be today if I had stayed. But like you I also have a lot of good things in my life that I probably wouldn’t have if I had made different decisions. Weird to think about.
Samantha @ 24 to 30 recently posted..Goals and Social Awkwardness
why isn’t “meeting linz” on your list of “really great decisions??????” huh? huh??
haha i regret not going to school in florida or california merely so i could have four years of beautiful weather because i always knew i wanted to end up in st. louis… wish i would have experienced a warm climate all year long sometime – now itz just vacay!
Linz @ Itz Linz recently posted..Harmonic Shampoo and Conditioner Giveaway
I have a similar college regret – I never, never, never, should have went to a private college. I really wish I went to a state school. Granted I got a ton of financial aid/scholarships and my debt isn’t bad (like $15K total) but it would have probably been zero if I had stayed in PA. Granted, I also agree that all the good things in my life have come after college so maybe it wasn’t the worst thing ever…but I still wish I did it different.
Carly D. @ CarlyBananas recently posted..Running, Cooking, and Bootcamping
I totally understand that and it can be the most frustrating thing in the world. But hindsight is 20/20, right?
I think that everyone has a few regrets along the same lines of yours. I just try to move forward and not fixate too much on things that are no longer in my control.
Carly @ Snack Therapy recently posted..My Story
I regret how many times I’ve let my weight determine whether or not I do an activity that doesn’t have a weight limit. Like a zipline has a weight limit so I physically can’t do that but snorkeling in the ocean and being paralyzed by fear at the thought of being in a bathing suit on a public beach so I don’t do it even though it’s my Mr’s favorite thing ever. We even rent homes with private pools on vacay so we can swim without ending up on YouTube or something. I really need to get over myself. I have an opportunity to stand up paddle in a few months and I’m terrified despite the fact I’m training for it on a balance board with a paddle. MUST. GET. OUT. OF. MY. OWN. HEAD!
Anele @ Success Along the Weigh recently posted..Doctor! Doctor!
I have a college related regret but lately I’ve been trying really hard not to live with regrets. Everything happens for a reason and I think that if I had went with my original plan, I would not be where I am today. And I have my beautiful son now so I can’t imagine not having a life with out him haha.
maria @ lift love life recently posted..A yoga company everyone needs to know about…
Both of my parents went to Nebraska for their undergraduate degrees so I am a Huskers fan by default
One thing I regret is not studying abroad while I was in college. It would have been the perfect time and opportunity to really experience a different culture.
Becky @ Olives n Wine recently posted..Ellie Review
I so want to run in the Nashville Country Rock n Roll half!! I already talked to my roommate about it, and we’ve loosely set a goal to do it next year. I <3 country music and I think it would be so much fun!
Meghan @ After the Ivy League recently posted..Thursday Thoughts
I highly recommend this race. It’s hilly but such a beautiful course and the music is awesome.
Dartmouth is literally a stones throw from where I grew up. I worked in Hanover (during HS & college) from 1998 – 2006. Where did you live? On campus or? So crazy!
I have lots of regrets, unfortunately, even though I think its best to live without. I regret where I went to college, and I regret a lot of rush decisions I made when I was there.
Kelly @ Cupcake Kelly’s recently posted..Playlist Thursday: Guilty Pleasures
I lived in Norwich, overlooking the river. It. Was. Amazing!!
I know exactly what you mean about regretting something but knowing it was meant to be! I stayed home at a local college when I really wanted to go to a small, private college about 8 hours away. I stayed home for a boy. But I did marry that boy, so it all worked out in the end.
BUT what if I hadn’t married him?!?!
Jennifer @ Chocolate Chips & Tricep Dips recently posted..Zucchini Fries and a Giveaway!
I try not to live with regrets because I am a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. When you live with regrets, you’re not living in the present moment. When you’re not living in the present moment, you’re missing out what is right in front of you! Great article, thank you for sharing!
JoLynn Braley
The F.A.T. Release Coach
My regret is very similar. I went away for college, to U of Iowa, and after 1 semester I transferred back home. I was failing Chemistry and realizing I wanted to change majors and I was too scared to end my long-distance relationship with my boyfriend at the time…so I moved back home. It was a heartbreaking decision and I often wonder how things would have been if I never transferred back. But, because I love my fiancé who I met after college, I know that the decision I made so long ago led me to my life now. Can’t help but wonder though.
Although I know everyone feels they have regrets, try to view them as decisions. The negative impact of ‘regret’ is heavy, and I dont think its healthy.
Try to focus on the positive things you have accomplished, what you have and what you want to do in the future.
There should be no rearview mirror to life!!!
: )
“There should be no rearview mirror to life” <–LOVE THIS! What a great perspective, Tara!
My regret is similar as well. I regret that I didn’t put more effort into exploring the world when I was younger. I regret that I never moved out of Maryland. I regret that I went to college and grad school to get two different degrees that I don’t use and will be paying off for a long time. But, rather than wish I could change the past, I’m determining my future and doing something about it!
And yes- like you said- you always have to keep in mind that things turned out this way for a reason. If you had gone away to college, you may have never met Neal!
Lauren @ Oatmeal after Spinning recently posted..[Super Thick] Shamrock Smoothie
Mine is college related as well. I wanted so badly to go away to school and got into some great colleges. My parents wouldn’t help me, even as to cosign a loan. I ended up going to a local community college, became a nurse. I went on on pursued my bachelors and I’m now enrolled in my masters. It’s helped me a lot. I’ve never actually paid for my education (scholarships go a lot further when the tuition is low) and I met my now fiance a week before I graduated with my associates.
I’m bitter that I didn’t go away, especially as they later financed my brothers entire education- also in nursing- at a state college and got him a swanky apartment.
I try not to dwell on it, but it hurts every once in awhile. Thanks for sharing your story! I sometimes feel insane that I’m 26 and living this great life and still have resentment for the things that played out when I was 18.
Some times I regret decisions I made when i was younger, but then I wonder if I would have the great things I have no if I had made different decisions.
Abby @ BackAtSquareZero recently posted..On My Own
I regretted transferring from my dream school after my freshman year but it turned out to be the best decision I’ve ever made. Funny you should mention Nebraska, I’m going to be seeing a lot of that place real soon!
Erin @ Girl Gone Veggie recently posted..My Trader Joes Shopping Bag Haul 2
As I age I mostly regret not getting or asking for help when I needed it. Of course, you don’t always know you need it…that’s the problem. There are places in my life where I can look back and see that I was so totally overwhelmed, and could have stood up for myself and demanded that my family step up…but no, I kept telling myself that I needed to be stronger, work harder, that things were my problem and I should shield my family and keep up the pace…it hurt everyone in the end.
I’m really glad you posted this. I’ve been thinking a lot about regrets and life goals ever since our conversation last week. It’s crazy that I’ve known you only a few short weeks and you have already helped me get perspective on my past and figure out what I want for my future. I think I really needed to meet you when I did…so thank you for the wake up call!
Amanda @ Running On Waffles recently posted..Pho and Banh Mi
I couldn’t agree more!! You have helped me more than you know! So grateful for you and Jen.
I do tend to agree with what some of the others have stated about not having regrets. Still, I chose a major in college, that, at the time I thought I really enjoyed, and it turned out to be a total flop for me. I went to Penn State for Mgmt Information Systems and now I work in that IT-related field, and I hate it. Now, granted, because of my strong distaste for it, that did lead me to finding a career path that I think I will love (nursing). Still, it would’ve been so much easier had I realized this back then and not now! So I’ve already been in school part time for 3 years for nursing (and this is for an associate’s degree first). It’s hard to sit in my current job everyday, where I’m miserable and hate almost everything about it except the paycheck. I just want to be a nurse already and actually not wasting energy on being miserable in a job every single day.
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